Busy summer and fatigued me!

Mood - fatigued
Song - no time to listen

I'm physically and emotionally burned out after two weeks. Other people started enjoying their short break now before school opens but for me I started getting busy despite my fatigue. I've been in school meeting Ruyi and Paul (my colleages-cum-projectmates) for almost everyday. When all my friends finish their internship now, I just got my job. Slacking the whole summer, I didn't expect to get this job at SMU-UOB Alliance Center to do a market research project for a client's brand with Ruyi and Paul. Coincedentally, they happen to be in my Services Marketing class now and become my groupmates. I started hating summer course now cos it started last Monday and we have to do a mini-presentation next Monday which is 15% of the final grade. So crazy lah! Final presentation (30%) is coming in 3 weeks time.

My life and time have been devoted to Icon since last year but just few weeks before I step down, I really feel pissed off being in Icon. People are f*cking lazy, irresponsible, slacking and dispassionate. Sorry for my language but I can't stand anymore. I'm gonna stepping down next month no matter what the result of my exchange application will be. If I can't go on exchange in term 2, it's fine. I won't join Icon Exco again. I do love Icon but I hate its Exco. How many people are really passionate about our vision and mission and dedicated their time and effort to it? Ask yourself why you joined it. Don't tell me you like to give the international students a great stay during SMU while you yourself as an Exco member is not taking a buddy. Don't tell me you don't wanna spend your time for one buddy but for whole club while no support has been received from you guys while making sure each exchange student receives a good buddy. You know yourself if you've ever tried to mingle around with exchange and international students.

Don't tell me you are busy doing internship/working. Am I not having my UOB job? Am I not busy representing Icon (despite lack of support) for Int'l Peace Day? Am I not sacrificing my summer holidays not to go back to my family or travel to another country for the sake of the club? Before taking your position, didn't you think about how you would manage yout time properly? Don't tell me a student's priority is always "to study". Then, why did you take this position? There are so many people who wanna make their resume good like you, yet still want to contribute to the club. Is it fair for them to forgo their chance to make their resume good while you are taking an official position yet not sacrificing yout time and effort for what you have got.

I'm really surprised that I didn't receive any supervision or support from all of you until the buddy program is done. Really thanks to Maisarah and SQ (who's not even an Icon's member) to help out and settle many complaints. I've been sleeping at 4 or 5 am for last weeks pairing up the buddies to exchange students, yet I was the one who had to do the briefing and control the whole crowds during/after the briefing. I was really upset that you are having fun while me an Maisarah were busy settling the complaints.

Never ever be a Vice President!!! It's a position with full responsibities and no authority. I'm wondering if the VP position is created to always replace the President or to always operate (not just oversee) each department's heads' job. No matter how clever Lee Kuan Yew is, he can't build Singapore by teaching every students in school, curing the patients in hospitals, building the ports and roads and cleaning the public toilets by himself. Sometimes I really think of my responsibilities as a VP. Do I have to manage the whole club taking over the President or do I have to create the club's emailers, taking meeting minutes and operate the events?

I was really exhausted after the briefing. There were so many people complaining for not pairing them up with their first choice. Come on how can I satifisy all your needs. A girl complaint not for giving her a Japanese but a Korean cos she put Japan as first and second choice but Korea as third choice. Hey last time I put Japan in my 1st, 2nd and 3rd preference and yet I got a Korean buddy though I didn't put it at all. But, I was still happy with my Korean buddy. In fact, it's been my happiest moment in SMU to be with that bunch of Korean students. Singaporeans only know how to complain while they themselves are giving super lousy service. Taking a Services Marketing currently, I become more and more irritated by them. Singapore is really a dog eat dog world. In the west, people complain a lot (may be worse than Singaporeans) but they do give compliments when they are served well. They know how to complain but when it's their turn to provide service, they know how to delivery a better service. Back in Myanmar and other 3rd world countries, services are very very bad, far below Singapore's standards but people hardly complain to save face. It's very simple. They don't provide. They don't complain. So Fair! But in Singapore. The service is not as good as that in US or it's just a little bit better than other Asian countries. But, the complaints are also as high as those in the States. See how selfish people are here? They complain but they themselves provide lousy service.

It's 4.00 am in the morning and I'm very tired. But, I'm still mad and can't sleep.